Like many others I took my vacation at the year end to spend time with the family and to catch up with my reading list. My wife and I had warned our children that the hotel had told us that they did not have television. We were driving out very early to avoid getting caught in traffic snarls. Before we left home, the family spent thirty minutes on their respective devices bidding good bye to their Facebook friends and warning them that they would be incommunicado for the next week or so.When we reached the hotel we discovered that not only was there no television, but there was no internet access and even the cell phone service was nonexistent. We were prepared for the no television bit, but being without the cell phone and internet was unexpected. Sometimes life offers us what we need and not what we want. The result was magical. We had conversations at the dining table and we read, went for walks and caught up with each other’s lives.On the way back from our vacation, my kids screamed and pointed out to a sign on the highway against a tiny café that said, “Free Internet”. Yes, we stopped there and I am ashamed to say that for the next thirty minutes the family ate lunch in silence. Each one furiously pecked away at their mobile phones. It was almost as if we had held our breath under water and then emerged to fill up our lungs.The office is no different. We exchange information, but there are fewer conversations. It is hard to have a meeting with anyone without the person’s phone ringing or vibrating urgently to frequently interrupt any conversation that is brewing. Text messages, status updates, bank transactions, travel deals, shopping suggestions all jostle each other to take place stealthily during meetings and presentations. We talk and text while driving. We would rather risk accidents than miss the tech-nudge.Research tells us that it is not efficient to multi-task and that it takes substantially longer to learn anything or complete tasks without singular focus. Social psychologists tell us that having grit and sticking to a task to see it through is an important predictor of success. Innovations happen when people hold conversations, get bombarded by alternative perspectives and data points, occasionally go into unrelated paths and alleys before coming back to the original topic and perhaps ending off in a different space altogether.Business challenges are far too complex to depend on a few bright individuals. Ideas need to be nurtured through conversations. Unlike transactions which are slickly efficient, these are messy—full of pauses and interruptions and topic changes and assorted awkwardness, says media researcher Sherry Turkle. In her book Alone Together, she talked about the paradox of how technology has left us more connected and more alone.We can run organizations in the Taylorian model to be progressively more efficient and judge them by their ability to process instructions. Maybe such workplaces should be measured the way we calibrate processor-speed, in million instructions per second. Alternatively we can clean up and create some space in our lives where we operate the way we would, in a café, with a group of really stimulating people for company – without their devices beeping. Innovations happen through conversations.—————-Join me on Twitter @AbhijitBhaduriFirst Published in Economic Times on 17 Jan 2014
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Lost Conversations
Comments
10 responses to “Lost Conversations”
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Innovations happen through Conversations…and this is beyond the self conversations..Paradoxically technology connects us ..but we have started operating in silos,,in our own virtual reality…the F2F [face to face conversation] is more in the virtual world!!!
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It is not just about good conversations. Probably we are also loosing out the faculty of fine writing.In a hurry to do more and more, we are ending up living less and less.
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Vishyji,what a horrible thought!The faculty of fine writing…no,never,please do not even mention that!Living less,yes I can see that but then who can we blame but ourselves.We collectively are not prepare to like one and all but then why should we?To one,his own.But let us draw the line there.The 18th and 19th century gave us great Russian and English literature.For this century so far we have had Martin Amis,Ian McEwan,Anita Brookner and Phillip Roth among others.There is a wealth of talent out there,let us not goof it up by saying we are close to losing the faculty of writing!Shhhhhhhhhh…..
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That’s why coming to Bangalore in person to catch up on the lost time and conversations reducing dependence on devices but using a little help with facilitators like Vodka and Tonic….
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Vodka and Tonic is old-school.Try Vodka with lactose-free milk.Talk about facilitators.
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We have no slot left in our life for quiet times ( to just read , think , plan or simply stare into space …ideas need little time and space to germinate ! ) and in depth discussions to brew ideas …because we are so furiously engaged usually through internet in mulitude of ‘ distraction activities ‘To create focus we need less distraction , instead we are constantly distracted ….but we choose this lifestyle …..no one held a gun to our head !Problem isThis techy lifestyle is addictive … i get withdrawal symptoms if I can not access internet for few hours . it is true that life has become endlessly easier because from banking to shopping internet has made things infinitely convenient … but it also made us utterly dependent on it and almost contols the way we do things and liveThere is no going back to the old ways of doing things but perhaps we need to make a concious effort to switch off from time to time . it can be very productive ….i
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Abhijit: You have hit the nail spot on! Our obsession with technology has made us lonely. I specially feel sorry for the kids who are brought up in this environment. They will possibly never realise the joys of a real conversation (adda as we Bongs call it!) and not “chats in the latest electronic fad, the pleasures of spending leisure reading a book (a real one that smells of newness) and not a ‘reader” and listening to music that fills the room (and the heart) and not an earplug! Enjoy life!
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Thanks Ellora, Vishy, Sashi, Rajan, Monica and Gautam for your comments.Conversations … and yes, the adda is a potent way to ideate. I am convinced that the countries that have had a strong “cafe-culture” or tea-culture if you will, are more creative. Would you agree?
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Thanks for your marvelous posting! I actually enjoyed reading it, you might be a great author.I will be sure to bookmark your blog and may come back down the road.I want to encourage you to continue your great work, have a nice morning!
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Indeed. The art of conversations is dying gradually.Look anywhere, people are glued to (prisoner of) their devices.Extra marital affairs happen because wife and husband get busy in own lives , don’t converse and hold up their true feelings and emotions. It takes a marriage counsellor to get husband and wife really talk to each other and then magic happens. Magic happens because of conversations, be it innovation in organizations or reunion of spouses.Watch the movie “Hope Rises” to see in action how a marriage counsellor gets a couple to truly converse with each other.
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