I fought with my boss. Now what?

The workplace can pose its unique challenges. Here is one that someone wrote in to ask about.

“Something happened last week that makes me wonder if I can face my boss again. In the middle of a highly charged work environment, when we were debating sales target for the current year, tempers ran high. I was being repeatedly challenged to fix a higher target by my boss two levels my senior. Unable to take it beyond a point, I let off some steam and things turned unpleasant between us. This happened in an open office meeting. I now feel awkward facing him. He hasn’t spoken to me since the incident and my immediate superior has refused to intervene. How should I break the ice and maintain continuity at work?”

People get hired for their competence and fired for personality. When we decide to work in an office, we are signing up to follow an accepted norm of behaviour. In some cases, it may mean being civil to our colleagues despite not having a good day at work. Our reputation at work is built or destroyed during moments of stress or even during moments of extreme boredom. At times our behaviour can stain years of spotless reputation as a reliable and pleasant co-worker.

Managing your emotions is an important element of leadership behaviour. It is irrelevant to go into a discussion on whether your emotional outburst was justified or not. Being able to build bridges with someone is a sign of great emotional maturity. What is the best way to do it?

1. Check with your boss if you could meet him for coffee or lunch. An informal setting helps to put both people at ease.

2. Acknowledge your awkwardness with the situation you are and state that you are interested in building a positive relationship at work. If you did meet your sales target tell the manager how happy the team is at meeting the target.

3. Avoid getting into who is right and who was wrong. Just state that you wish to move ahead and look forward to working more effectively in future.

4. End the chat by thanking the manager for being open enough to meet and sort things out. That would encourage him to reciprocate.

5. When times are stressful a little humour and laughter in the workplace puts everyone at ease. When there is a deadline that the team is working towards, set common break-times every 90 minutes. It helps to unwind together.

That is what I suggested. What would you have suggested? Would you suggest a different approach? I would love to know. Do leave your views in the comments below.

First published by Times of India dated April 18, 2019